You Are Mine Read online

  “I'm fine. Thank you for getting Chancellor Zade.”

  Fine except for the spy spell lingering on you. I wish I could tell her about it. Instead I have to minimize what she knows. What she could pass on to Father.

  “I only told him you had a limp. He insisted on fixing it himself, though I'm sure your gratitude was be appreciated.” Usually lying isn't so bad. I've done it often enough to Father. Never once have I felt guilty for telling one, until now. This is so different and much worse. It feels like it's eating at me from the inside. I can't think like this. Lying to Bethany is like lying to Father, for now at least. The reminder doesn't help.

  No one speaks. It really hits me that my sisters are only allowed to be here to spy on me. I can't trust them with anything, and as soon as Father has no further need for spying on us, they'll go home. If his plans turn out like he wants, I'll be going home with them. My stomach churns at the thought.

  “This is another of Serena's new gowns.” Cynthia finally breaks the silence. “Isn't it lovely?”

  “It is,” Bethany says. “I wish I could have one like it.”

  “Best of all it's a two piece.” I grin. Father should hear this. It will make him furious, but it's not unlawful. Or maybe it was too impulsive. Will he find a way to punish her from a distance? Or what if he punishes my other sisters? There's nothing I can do to protect them.

  “I didn't realize before, but I see it now. How clever.” Bethany grins. “I'm going to enjoy your new wardrobe. I wish we were the same size so I could pilfer a dress or two.”

  I laugh. “And I'll be glad we aren't.”

  “You should meet Katherine,” Cynthia says. “Didn't Waverly need to talk to her anyway? We could go to town and stop by for a visit.”

  Will letting Bethany meet Katherine put the seamstress in danger as well? If Bethany is to help with the ball, she'll have to meet her sooner or later. I'd like to see Katherine anyway.

  “But we don't have a chaperon,” Bethany says.

  Cynthia starts to protest, but I stop her. “She's probably right. I like going out on my own, but Chancellor Zade scolded me the other day for it. I'll see if he is interested in going to town today.”

  Cynthia scrunches her nose. “You're so strange sometimes. Go ask then. We'll want to spend all day there if we can. Especially to make the carriage ride for you worthwhile. We'll meet you back at the house.”

  I head back for the Chancellor. After trying so hard this morning to avoid him, here I am rushing back. I go straight for the dining room, hoping he's still there. When I enter the dining room, he's still at the table, spells hovering before him. More spells of different colors flash through the window every so often, joining the others. I wait at the other side of the room where he can see me, wondering what the spells are for.

  Several minutes later he says, “Why are you standing there?”

  “Because I need to speak with you?”

  “Then come here and talk.”

  I don't dare get any closer. “What are those spells doing?”

  He looks at the lights, then at me. With a wave of his hand, a black one zooms out the window. Though there are still several in front of him, no new ones appear. “They're bringing me news from home and around Chardonia.”

  “How can you get news from light?”

  “Come here, I'll show you.”

  I hesitate a moment, but not long. I'm too curious. Once I'm next to him, he waves his hand and a green light moves to the front. I gasp. From this angle, the light is made of words.

  “I've never seen anything like it.”

  “I don't suppose you would. Seems like Chardonians like to keep most magic from women.”

  Could it be true? It makes sense. Most spells I've seen have been hexes. Father occasionally did something different like chill his wine, but that happened rarely.

  “I know you didn't come here to talk about this. What did you need?”

  “You've been scolding me,” I blurt out, still thinking of how I know mostly hexes. What else can they do with magic?

  “No, I've been reading the paper. If you're referring to last night, forget I mentioned anything. About the kiss any way. I'm serious about everything else that was said.”

  My face warms at mention of this kiss. “Not about that. I told the girls you've been scolding me for going out on my own.”

  “Why?”

  I lower my voice. “Because we're being spied on and it just isn't done. I love doing it, but it gives people an impression you don't want to make. Sure it's not against one of the laws you listed, but it's still expected. This is a good way for you to show your dominance. Take control of your possessions.” When he says nothing, I continue, “Unless you don't want to take us to town. We could stay home. That would show your dominance as well.”

  After staring at me a moment, he rubs the bridge of his nose. “What are you doing in town?”

  “Taking the girls to see my seamstress.”

  His voice deepens. “We've got to get ready for the ball, woman. Call for the carriage.”

  I gape at him. He waves a hand at me and I stumble from the room feeling confused. Why did he suddenly become so harsh? After a few moments, I realize he was teasing. It's something I've done with my sisters, but never a warlock. Not sure how to feel about that, I find the girls and call for the carriage.

  Once everyone is ready, we begin loading into the carriage, except Zade who rides alongside on horseback. Waverly pouts over not being able to ride with him. He insists it isn't proper in Chardonia. When Cynthia and Bethany aren't watching, he winks at her. I spin away from them, a twisting in my gut.

  The ride is filled with talk of the ball, Cynthia and Bethany quickly drawing Waverly out of her pout. I stare at the solid doors, wishing I could watch the scenery go by. If I learned to ride a horse like Waverly, I could be out there as well. If it got rid of dealing with carriage sickness, it would be worth it. Wait— What am I thinking? Horses are huge and have big eyes. Not to mention, Zade's right, it isn't proper.

  When the carriage stops, the footman opens the door, and everyone else piles out. I wait, giving myself a minute to let my stomach settle.

  Zade leans in. “Are you coming?”

  A breeze blows in from outside, cooling me. “Yes, I just need a moment.”

  “She gets carriage sickness,” Bethany calls out.

  “You do?” Zade asks.

  “Yes.”

  “That's easy enough to fix. I have a spell that would help if you'd like.”

  Should I allow him to cast a spell on me? I've never wanted a spell cast on me before, but it would be nice not to be ill. The truth spell wasn't so bad. “Does it hurt?”

  “Not at all.”

  Maybe spells other than hexes aren't so bad. The light spell he showed me that brings news wasn't. I take a deep breath. This well help me feel better. I can let him do it. “Then yes, would you please?”

  “Of course.” A blue light glides from his hand and surrounds me before penetrating my skin. My stomach instantly settles.

  “How's that?”

  “Much better, thank you.”

  “Glad I could help.”

  He holds out a hand. An unfamiliar tingle races through me as my gloved hand touches his. As soon as I'm on the ground, I let go of his hand, though part of me doesn't want to, but the feeling continues. After I straighten my skirt, he pulls the door of the shop open. I'm more aware than ever of his close presence when I pass him.

  Katherine looks up, with puffy eyes, from speaking with another tarnished. “Welcome. I'm so glad you all came. This is my assistant, Mavis. Please, come in.”

  Everyone moves to stand next to me, Zade entering the shop and closing the door once we're all in. I wait for Zade to say something, but he only stares at me. It makes his role appear less domineering, but hopefully a minor detail.

  “Morning, Katherine,” I say. “You've met everyone except my sister Bethany.”

  “Nice to m
eet you and welcome to everyone. Please pick a seat. Mavis will you help them get settled?”

  Mavis, who has a narrow, happy face, steps forward. “Of course.”

  “Thank you.” Katherine turns to me. “Would you help me gather some refreshments?”

  I wonder at her asking me and not Mavis, but I've done more than enough in a kitchen to know my way around. Really, it's been too long since I've helped. Plus, the distance from Zade might help clear my awareness of him. “Of course.”

  I follow her past the main seating area down a small hall to a tiny kitchen. She pumps water into a jug and directs me to cut the stems off some strawberries.

  In a lowered voice she says, “Chancellor Zade visited a few days ago.”

  “Zade?” I pause cutting. Once the shock has worn off, I resume, fear making me smash the berries more than slice them. “Was he angry about the dresses?”

  “Not at all.”

  While I'm grateful he didn't punish her, why else would he visit? She pulls out a tray and fills it with glasses. When the tray is full, she turns her attention on me. “I thought you should know he finished paying for the entire wardrobe I gave you and commissioned ball gowns for you, your sisters, and Waverly.”

  “He did?” I'm too stunned to put the strawberries in the jug. Katherine takes them from me and does it. Dresses? Not only mine, but Cynthia and Bethany's? And Waverly, a servant?

  “Actually, he overpaid. Insisted on it.”

  She grabs a plate of biscuits and places it on the tray. It's all ready to go, but we stand there. Hearing this is not helping to distract my thoughts from him as I'd prefer. I don't know what to think of him.

  “Why did he pay you?”

  “I don't know, but I wanted you be aware of what he did,” she says. “He's different. Next time you need something, ask him for the money. I doubt he'd want to know what it's for.”

  Would he really be so careless about his money with me? “He's supposed to let me know when I need something.”

  “But men don't always know, do they?”

  They rarely do. “But that's not how it works.”

  “It will if you ask.”

  I look at her swollen eyes. “Are you all right?”

  She rearranges the glasses. “I'm fine.”

  “No, really Katherine, how are you? You don't seem yourself.”

  “I'm not,” she whispers. “But no one can do anything about it.”

  “What happened? At least let me try.”

  “It would only lead to more trouble.”

  Despite my protests, she picks up the tray and leaves the room. What could possibly be the problem? She's done so much for me, I hate to see anything bad happen to her. It's easier to focus on her situation than on Zade as I grab the jug and follow after her.

  Everyone is settled on the chairs and sofa. Katherine has left the tray on the table and is handing everyone a glass. After pouring everyone some strawberry lemon water, I set the jug on the table next to the tray and pass around the biscuits. Once everyone is served, I grab my own and take the only free space left, next to Zade.

  “Waverly,” I say, “the idea of having an exotic theme is a good one. Can you tell us more about balls in Envado?”

  “Well, I've never been to a Chardonian one to compare it to, but next to weddings and babies, they are the most celebrated events. Magicians come from all over to cast for them.”

  “Spells at a ball?” At the one I attended, there weren't any.

  “What sort of spells?” Cynthia asks.

  “The gowns for one,” Waverly says. “It's one of the few times women wear formal dresses, the type that takes two or three people to get you into. All of them are spelled in some way. They change colors, styles, they sparkle. They vary as much as the people in attendance.”

  “A spelled dress?” Katherine says. “I've never thought of that.

  I say, “You haven't? Seeing the dresses you've created so far and hearing your ideas, I was sure every idea for a dress had crossed your mind.”

  “Would you be able to spell a ball gown or two for me, Chancellor?” Katherine asks.

  “Changing colors is simple if you have examples. Sparkles or flashes easy as well. But, I've never been great at switching styles. It'd help if there were two dresses I could spell to become one alternating piece.”

  Wearing even more new dress styles? How will people react to this? Will we get in even more trouble for it? I don't know if having spelled dresses is a problem or not. Despite problems that may arise, I'm curious to see what they'd be like. Maybe even wear one. And wearing one that Zade helped to spell for me? The thought brings the tingling feeling back.

  “It sounds as if you've had a lot of experience with this before,” Cynthia says.

  “A few times. I've a sister I help on occasion.”

  “And your sister told me you—” Waverly starts, but Zade interrupts.

  “She was always grateful for my help. Always.”

  She giggles. “That's not what I heard.”

  “Servant gossip is highly unreliable.” He scowls.

  “Actually,” Katherine says, “servants are one of the best sources of information.”

  “Hah!” Waverly says.

  “Envadi servants aren't like the ones from here.” Bethany's quiet voice sounds for the first time.

  We all look at Waverly who blushes. “Sorry.”

  Everyone bursts out laughing, except Waverly, but she quickly joins. The topic drifts back to the ball. The girls soon have lost me with the details. So many things to plan, but I can't manage to keep track of them.

  “Serena?”

  I glance up at Katherine. “I'm sorry, what was that?”

  “I said I've finished altering a gown if you'd like to take it home. You're welcome to try it on.”

  “You work fast. I'm sure it will fit fine.”

  “Try it on,” Bethany says. “I'd love to see what another one is like.”

  “Why don't you?” Zade asks. I stare at him and he grins at me. “I'd like to see it as well.”

  That's as good as an order, yet I know I'm blushing because of it. Asserting himself is coming a little too naturally. But that must mean he does want to see me in it. “I suppose I could.”

  “Please make yourselves comfortable, Chancellor, girls. Let Mavis know if you need anything,” Katherine says. “Waverly and I'll have Serena back soon.”

  She leads Waverly and me back to the changing room. Katherine hands me a gown.

  “You can change in there,” she points to a curtained off section of the room,

  The dressing area has a small chair and a place to hang my current dress. I change, still amazed at how quickly I can manage, and by myself. I step out.

  Waverly claps her hands. “Wonderful.”

  “Yes, the fit is better. I added holes in all your right pockets so you could get your gun.”

  “My gun? I don't have one.” I put my hand in my right pocket, and sure enough there's a hole big enough to pull out a gun.

  ”Chancellor Zade's orders.” He must have been more serious than I thought about making me learn. I lock my jaw as Katherine continues. “There's a mirror you can use.” She points to a full length mirror to the side, standing on a black frame. Anxious to see, I step to it.

  “It does look good.” The maroon material hugs me, but gives with my movements until my waist where it flares and flows to the floor. “I should go show my sisters.”

  “And the Chancellor,” Katherine says.

  What will Zade think of me? I don't move from in front of the mirror.

  Katherine says, “I know you don't want to marry, but you can't change it now.” She comes closer to me and adjusts my sleeve, whispering, “Unless there's something you want me to help you with?”

  She did offer to help me escape. But the offer seems even less appealing than it did before, if it would actually even work. “No.”

  A mischievous grin transforms her face. “What if
you tried to make him fall in love with you?”

  The memory of his lips on mine, makes my hands shake. “What do you mean?”

  “You're dressed nice. We could do your hair a little fancier and give you some face paint. If you did that more often and then spent some time with him, try to find something you have in common.”

  I play with the hem of my sleeve.

  “Maybe love is too strong of a word. But you could at least be friends.”

  Friends. With a warlock?

  “Do you really not want to marry him?”

  Whatever I say, Waverly could tell him. Yet, he said I could trust her. Even if she does tell, it won't change anything. She's been oddly silent during the whole exchange. I watch her from the corner of my eye. She's paying very close attention.

  “No. I don't want to be married at all. Whether to him or someone else. It's not what I would choose for myself or my sisters. Not that women really have a choice. The thing is...”

  “Go on,” Katherine says. They both look so concerned, like they really want to know.

  I stare at the dress in the mirror. It laces across the front, allowing me to dress myself. Giving me the freedom, unless someone catches me breaking rules. Deep inside, my feelings burst. “You're right, Katherine, I don't want to be married, but things are different than I expected. He's never hurt me, at least not intentionally. Zade's rather kind. He's given me a lot of space and freedom.”

  And how I feel around him. I don't want to think what that means. I pick up my skirt. “And apparently helped pay for clothes that I didn't need, but wanted. The freedom is wonderful, but it feels sort of false. He still owns me. Nothing will change that. How can I be friends with someone who owns me?”

  I force a laugh. “Listen to me complain when I don't even have to work. I'm sorry. If I could change things for the two of you, I would.”

  “Oh posh,” Katherine says. “I'm as free as I can be and you've already helped me more than you think.”

  “And I wanted to be here,” Waverly says. “The laws aren't what I'd like. My mother almost fainted when I told her, but it was my choice.”

  Does that mean the laws are different in Envado?

  “See,” Katherine says. “You're only telling us what we asked for. Now, we can't do anything about him owning you, but we can make him glad he does, which should make things better for you. The closer you get to him, the less you'll be a possession.”